In Curiosity We Trust

by Melanie Gruenwald

I have two stories to share.

A friend visited a neighbor’s house and saw a sign of political intent. You know the kind of metamorph- the sign on the front yard or the shirt that promotes a candidate. It led to discomfort, and wondering if they share any values with this individual, if their political leanings diverge.

I was speaking with another friend about starting an informal book group- and we were thinking about people we might include. She became quiet and delicately said—“I don’t know if I can be in a group with this person, they affiliate with a different political party. It doesn’t feel safe.”

This is more common than I like to think. People are afraid to come together, due to political difference. These are smart, compassionate humans- who I love dearly. And even for them, this is true.

This concept challenges what we teach at Kabbalah Experience—we are all created in the image of the Divine. The Light (Ohr) within me, reflects the light (Ohr) within you. This is a core teaching of who we are and the work we do. And yet, these feelings are valid and all too common. Political alignment becomes a statement of safety and belonging. While we are working to heal our broken world, wouldn’t it make sense to come closer to the other rather than distance ourselves farther?

Rabbi Sharon Brous writes in The Amen Effect, “Those who hold opposing political views are not just ideological foes. Increasingly, we see one another as existential threats.  And once two people no longer inhabit overlapping universes, well, it’s not hard to imagine devaluing their humanity altogether.” (p. 152)

The notion of othering feels more unsafe to me, than sitting at the table with a person with different political views. I would be more prone to fear if they were carrying a gun, or threatening my right to exist. How many families have been splintered by opposing political views? If we can’t come together in conversation, especially about non-political issues, then how can we re-build our society? How can we see the humanity in one another?

We might choose to wear a hat for Trump or a shirt for Harris—and that does make a comment about our stances on values and policies. However, does it mean we cannot be in the same room or volunteer together?

Rabbi Brous teaches— How did we get here? She identifies two trends– Social alienation- disintegration of collective bonds, leading to the fragmentation of our society– and Tribalization- harsh lines of social division that carve up the population into exclusive, homogenous, often oppositional groups. Social alienation and tribalization are leading to erosion of empathy- dragging dangerous, malignant forces from the margins to the mainstream. She writes, “The convergence of these trends is leading us right to the edge of the abyss.”

How might we stay at the table, with a mindset of curiosity, so we can see the other as a holy partner in our work of growth, reflection and healing? How do we learn to stay at the table when it gets uncomfortable to hear another’s views? (Please, leave if its unsafe). How might we engage in authentic conversation, respectful dialogue, and see ourselves as partners in the pursuit of democracy?

Rabbi Brous encourages us to listen with curiosity and wonder.

We can’t heal a world where everything is a battle; every conversation is a ‘win’ or ‘lose’ interaction. We can’t heal a world where we disengage if we disagree…. We need to find a place where we can recognize the humanity, the oneness, and the potential that is in each of us.

“This is not a path toward capitulation, but instead toward sacred recognition of each other’s humanity. This may be our best and most enduring chance to mend our broken hearts and world.” (Amen Effect, p 174)

My hope, in these final months before November 5^th—and moving forward—is that we find ways to sit at the table in discomfort and dialogue. Find ways to see the humanity in the other. Find ways to approach one another with curiosity and kindness.  This is how we will move forward together as a nation and a humanity.

Please join us this fall in an exploration of Democracy and Kabbalah: Narratives and Action for Our Time